Brody's Gravestone

Brody's grave stone was finally finished and installed-- big thanks to Trish' parents for offering to pay for it.

Short Video of Brody on Spring Break Last year....Listen to that Laugh!!

Link to a video of our last Easter with Brody in our home

Past Pics on the "Picture Tree"

Here are some past pics on our "Picture Tree" when the tree still had it's other half....

Pics on the "Picture Tree"

We like to take pics each year of the boys on this tree by the river.  We were shocked to find that half the tree had been cut-off this year. We decided to take pics this year on the same tree anyway.  The picture of Brody in his Obituary was taken on this tree (he was sitting on the part that is now cut off).  We plan to put that picture of Brody on his grave stone too.  

Geordi and Jaden Playing at the Park Today

I sat on this bench today and thought of Brody

Brody's Favorite Swing

Brody loved the baby swings at the park in Grand Rapids, Ohio.  He could still fit in them in the summer of 2013.  We didn't get to take him there in 2014 (He was in Columbus all summer).  I am thinking he may have finally outgrew them by 2014 if we had been able to take him.  But he loved that these swings had very long chains and you could swing super high.  I loved that about the swings there too.  Plus the regular (non-baby swings) had a flat very large seat that my bottom could fit into comfortably.  lol! They are very comfy swings.  Brody preferred the baby swings because the regular ones felt too big to him and it was easier to hold onto his nephrostomy bag in the baby swing.

I wish Brody and I could have enjoyed those swings together again today.

Geordi and Jaden enjoying hanging by the river on Easter

Happy Easter and New Cherished Memories!

Jaden eagerly and excitedly awakened the Pizzifred household bright and early Easter morning.  The anticipation of what that Easter bunny may have left was just too much to possibly consider letting us all sleep-in.  Our attempts to convince Jaden that we all needed just a little more sleep were futile.  At least he decided to wake us up first before heading downstairs.  We certainly didn't want to miss what is probably his last Easter of believing in the Easter Bunny.  We all dragged ourselves downstairs as Jaden buzzed from room to room checking everything out.  He emptied and inspected everything in his Easter basket in no time flat!  Then he was calling to Geordi, "Come on, Geordi!  Look at all the eggs!  Get a bag!  Let's go!"   Geordi was still half asleep but grabbed a bag and the egg hunt began.  Jaden was running a mile a minute and Geordi was still trying to get his eyes open (as were mom and dad).  Geordi was a great big brother this morning and convinced himself to just wake up and get busy hunting eggs.  He was enjoying seeing his little brother so excited.  Also, he knew Jaden would be disappointed if he didn't have a brother/buddy enjoying the egg hunt with him.  It didn't take them long to find a bunch of eggs.  I think they found them all.  But you never know.  There always seems to be that random egg here or there you find over the next few days.  

We spent last Easter in the hospital with Brody.  It was a good day though.  Brody felt pretty good and we were all together having a good time.  

Two years ago, Brody was so excited about Easter morning, that he was having a very hard time falling asleep.  Eventually, he decided he just had to come down the stairs and at least take a peek at what the Easter Bunny had brought so that he could then go to sleep.  He ended up hunting for all the eggs in the middle of the night.  He didn't collect them but instead scouted out the locations of all the eggs.  He didn't take anything out of his Easter basket either, but took a good look at everything in there.  Then he was finally calm enough to go to sleep.  The next morning he had the 411 and big advantage over his brothers in the egg hunt.  He decided to try to make it more fair by telling his brothers what he had done and give them lots of pointers as to where all the eggs were hidden.  Being the youngest of three boys though, I think it was about time he had the advantage.  Usually his older brothers collected far more eggs than he did each year.  But not this time.  Brody got just as many eggs that year.  The boys and I have the fondest memories of that Easter.  It was the last Easter Brody had at our house and he was just so excited that year.  Geordi and Jaden have been talking about their memories of that Easter for the last several days and again today.  

We all miss Brody and witnessing his excitement for this holiday.  Easter is not the same without him.  Really no day is the same without him.  Our family has so many things for which we are grateful and happy. We are lucky in many ways.  For the most part, we are happy people.  But under that is that constant anguish and the heaviness in our hearts.  Underneath every smile, are tears that could erupt at any moment.  It's always there!  I can be happy and excited in one sentence and then suddenly not able to finish my next sentence.  I without warning and very suddenly become verklempt and unable to speak.  My emotions are so raw that I physically cannot speak or get the next word out.  This happens to me numerous times a day.  I am more likely to become unable to speak than to actually start crying.  Although crying  is often right behind the unable to speak scenario.  So if you are ever talking to me and I am all excited and then suddenly not speaking or finishing my sentence a few seconds later, you'll know just to give me some time.  I now live my life always on this verge. I wish I could at least manage to get a few words out...even just to say, "I need a minute."  Instead I get stuck with someone looking at me like I am crazy as I suddenly just stop talking.   I really don't think this is going away anytime soon either.  I would be surprised if it ever does.  It always happens so unexpectedly too.  It's so random and often it happens when I am talking about something that has nothing to do with Brody.  I can talk and talk about Brody and be just fine.  I am generally very happy to talk about Brody.  The raw emotions burst on through usually during other conversations which makes it all the more awkward when I suddenly lose the ability to speak.   I go through this life now striving for staying in the happy and mostly that's where I am but there is constant sadness and anguish always just under the surface.  I wish I had better words to describe it.  Life does not feel anywhere close to the same and I imagine it never will again.    

Today was a happy day.  I still felt the constant angst underneath but happy was surfing on top of it.  

After the egg hunt this morning, I decided I needed a nap.  It was wonderful nap!  I had dreams of Brody hunting eggs in the clouds.  He was swimming through the clouds, giggling and collecting eggs with lots of other children.  He looked to be having the most awesome egg hunt ever soaring through the clouds!  I awoke from the dream feeling joy, a calmness, and peace.  

I headed downstairs to find my boys were getting hungry despite their candy feast this morning.  I decided to make us a brunch, throw some dinner in the crock pot, and then we all wanted to head over to the cemetery.  

We took a white, wooden, bunny to the cemetery for Brody.  We were surprised to find Brody already had an Easter visitor at the cemetery that morning.  There was a stuffed yellow duck with a note attached setting next to his grave when we arrived.  It turned out to be from his buddy, Morgan Grass.  She was our neighbor and played with Brody, Geordi, and Jaden nearly everyday for several years.  She left him a precious note with the duck wishing him a very Happy Easter in heaven.  We all spent a bit of time at the cemetery talking to and about Brody.  It was warm and sunny and it just felt good to be outside.  

We decided it was too nice outside to not spend the majority of our day outside.  We headed to Grand Rapids, Ohio and spent our day hiking along the river.  We stopped and watched the rapids, talked, and enjoyed each other's conversation too.  We talked of past fun times and about many plans for upcoming summer fun.  We enjoyed a couple camping trips at Mary Jane Thurston State Park which is located on the river.  We reminisced about those trips and started making plans for another camping trip there this summer.  Brody's favorite swings (and mine) are at a park in Grand Rapids by the river.  We have had many fond memories at that park.  Today we made new ones.  I really enjoyed sitting by the river talking with Geordi, Jaden, and Bill this afternoon.  Today was a pleasant and happy day.

Missing Brody and Wishing Him a Happy Birthday in Heaven

We all are missing Brody each and every day.  Today was especially a tough one though.  Brody is 9 years old today and celebrating his first birthday in heaven.  I thought of Brody often today.  This is nothing new and I will tomorrow too.  I keep trying to picture him in heaven laughing, running, smiling and playing.  I tried to convince myself he is having his best birthday yet. If heaven is for real, then just imagine all the fun he could be having on his first birthday in heaven.  

Unfortunately, I still have my doubts about heaven.  I keep trying not to think about it.  I want to just imagine him continuing to be his happy self.  I don't want to think about his life not continuing on.  I keep looking for signs....anything to let me know his spirit/his soul continues on.  I am his mother.  Why can't I feel his presence?  I love him more than any words could possibly describe but I can't feel him with me.  I pray and pray and pray for God to help me just know He is there and that Brody is there with Him.  But I just don't feel it.  I open my heart and beg for me to somehow just have the capacity to have that kind of faith.  But yet, I don't have that faith.  I keep trying to put myself back into that moment on my wedding day when I knew without a doubt that my grandpa was there despite him passing not long before my wedding day.  I felt him there and I knew he was happy.  Why don't I feel Brody? Why can't I know without a doubt he lives on and he's happy?   I start to question now if really felt my grandpa that day.  Because, why can't I feel Brody?  I don't expect to feel him here with me all the time or anything.  Just once I want to feel him here with me like I felt my grandpa on my wedding day.  

Today we went to the cemetery to celebrate and honor Brody's birthday.   We made a wreath to place by his grave.  We filled the wreath with cheerful flowers because only cheerful will do if it's for our happy Brody.  We placed laminated pictures and cherished toy animals in the wreath too.  The wreath was adorned with a birthday ribbon and a note from all of us today too.  All of us (Bill, Geordi, Jaden, and I) wrote birthday wishes and special notes for Brody on slips of paper which we placed in balloons.   We took the wreath and balloons to Brody's grave.  The wreath was placed next to his grave.  We all sang "Happy Birthday" to Brody.  It was tough to get through singing the song.  I couldn't quite sing all of it.  My voice just disappears when I start to cry.  No words are even able to come out.  I was able to regain my composure and avoid an all out crying session though.  Thank goodness!!  I wanted things to be a happy little celebration.  No crying!!  But hey, you just can't help it sometimes.  We were all mostly tough and fought the urge to start crying.  We want to be happy for Brody and picture him having fun on his birthday.   So we tried to just picture that and be happy for him.  After we sang "Happy Birthday" we released his birthday balloons into the sky.  It was cold, wet, and windy.  They went far up into the sky very quickly.  We watched them until we couldn't even see the smallest speck of any of them in the sky.  Silently, I prayed for God to somehow let Brody capture those balloons and read those notes.  

On one of the notes I placed in the balloon, I asked for Brody to show me in my dreams how he spent his birthday.   I dream of Brody every night.  They are wonderful and extremely vivid dreams.  I wake up and remember them throughout the day in great detail.  I see things all throughout my day that remind me of pieces of these dreams.   The dreams have been my peace through this journey.  I, of course, have been trying to convince myself that this is Brody showing me that he is okay and that he is happy.  He lives on in my dreams and shares his new world with me there.  We talk and talk and talk about so many things.  He tells me of his friends and family there and  the fun things he gets to do.  His hair is lighter brown and almost blonde.  His eyes are the brightest, blue-green and healthy glowing skin.  He is not skinny anymore and has defined muscles on his once skinny little arms and legs.  He walks and runs with a normal gait (no foot drop).  There are no tubes and no port!  I see a healthy and happy Brody in my dreams.   I don't get to see his new world (or heaven) in my dreams.  My dreams start with me remembering fun times with Brody here.  I see these events replay but then after my replay dream of a past happy Brody time, the new Brody shows up and starts talking to me.  I even ask him in my dreams to take me with him so I can meet his new friends and talk with our family too.  I ask him to take me with him on his adventures.  He always laughs and tells me he can't and that I can't come yet.  In my dreams, I never argue back and just accept that answer and am just happy to see Brody.  He tells me about his day and I tell him about things here.  In my dreams I don't ask him questions about God or heaven or what to expect when I die or what happened when he died.   It never occurs to me in my dreams to possibly ask that.  I am not in control of the conversations in my dreams.   I just see a scene playing out in front of me in my dream.  It's like I am watching a TV show of Brody and I talking.  I have no say or guidance of the conversations.  

I don't really know if it's actually Brody popping into my dreams.  But I sure do hate it when I get woke up in the middle of one of my Brody dreams.  I try so hard to fall back asleep and get right back there with him.  I am just absolutely sure it's really him when I have been awakened from one of these dreams.  But when I fall back asleep, I don't fall back into the same dream.  I don't get to return right back to him.  Strangely, I often do this with other dreams.  Whether it's really Brody or not, I am thankful for my Brody dreams.  

In the days leading up to Brody's passing, his friend Tiana that had passed away previously kept showing up in Brody's dreams.  He also had repeated dreams or arguments with what looked to be a multitude of people for several days before he passed away.  He would fall asleep and you would see him start shoving his arms out in front of him like he was pushing several people away from him.  He was making every effort he could with his sick and feeble body to keep people away.   At the same time he appeared angry, annoyed and scared too as he repeatedly would say "no not yet!...Stop it!!....not yet!!....Stop it!!....Noooo!!"   These were the phrases that he would yell out in his sleep.  We would wake him up and sometimes we would ask him what he was dreaming about.  Usually he didn't really answer the question.  But sometimes he would say, "I wasn't talking to you."   As if he was trying to tell us he wasn't yelling that stuff at us.  He would sometimes peer across the room like he could see somebody.  He wouldn't usually say anything but he looked scared of whatever or whoever it was.  And sometimes even when he was awake he would peer sternly at someone we couldn't see and say, "not yet."   For the last couple days of his life, every time he fell asleep this whole scenario would repeat over and over again.  When we would wake him up, you could see a look of sheer panic on his face which quickly would turn the to such utter relief when he could see he was awake and right back here with us.  Brody never gave up fighting.  He believed even after we told him that his doctors had no more they could do to treat his cancer that he would still beat cancer.  I had to tell him that unless God granted us a miracle the cancer was going to kill him.  He chose to believe he would get his miracle and that he was going to live.  Brody hung on and kept fighting.  I think it's quite possible loved ones were coming to Brody in his dreams and seeking to take him into whatever the next life would be.  But, Brody my wonderful and very stubborn (determined) little boy had made up his mind that it just was not his time yet!  So he kept shoving them away and telling them..."No!!...Not yet!!....Stop it!!...No!!"  Brody kept doing this until very close to the time he passed.  He was asleep and all of the sudden, he was no longer angry and fighting.  He was just suddenly calm.  He had finally decided that it was okay to go.   His breathing slowed and then the time between each breath suddenly got much longer and longer.  He decided it was time and he just went.  Peacefully, suddenly, and calmly.  He was surrounded by myself, Bill, Geordi, Jaden, papaw, and grandma.   We held his hands and rubbed his arms.  We told him we loved him and that it was okay to let go before he took his last breath. 

Some powerful things transpired in Brody's dreams before he passed away.  And, now my dreams of Brody help give me the power and strength to get through each day without him.    

Brody's Funeral & Eulogy

Brody's Funeral was yesterday and other than the extremely cold weather went off exactly as we wanted.

We know Brody's short life has affected many people greatly and while this is a sad time for us, knowing he has brought great joy and inspiration to people is a wonderful legacy.

We knew Brody was slipping away the last few weeks of his life and so Trish started writing  his Eulogy. She wrote this last week overnight while Brody was sleeping and many people came to me after the service asking us for copies of it as it is truly inspirational so we are sharing this below.

I know many people wanted to come to his funeral and were unable to and so I wanted to post the songs we played immediately before and after his eulogy during his service as well. During his eulogy we played a slideshow of pictures taken during his life of him and his friends and family having fun. I will try to post the slideshow online at a later date but we hope everyone that sees this finds some inspiration from Brody's Life Lessons.

Bill

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When someone is taken from us, as Brody was, at such a young age, understandably we are not comfortable with words or phrases that point towards a celebration of their life.  Immense anger, deep hurt, inconsolable grief, rage, disbelief, these are just a few of the words and feelings that are associated with thoughts of Brody’s death.   How can an eight year old sweet, little boy be taken from us?   He was diagnosed with cancer just after celebrating his fourth birthday.  He gracefully and tenaciously fought cancer for 4 and half years, actually, nearly 5 years.  Brody’s 9^th birthday would be on March 3^rd, 2015.  He endured so much suffering only to be taken so young. 

But hidden in all the pain and sorrow that we feel, there is undeniably something to celebrate.   We can celebrate the fact that we have known Brody and that he was a part of our lives.   In his very short life, he has made such an impact on the lives of so many people.  Knowing Brody, has forever changed me and impacted how I face each and every day in my life.   I am not the only one.  Countless people have shared with me stories and kinds words of how Brody has inspired and changed their lives. 

Let me share a poem I wrote in July 2014 which was inspired by Brody during one of his many painful days in his battle against cancer. 

IN THE MOMENT

I try to fight back my tears
As you bravely fight the pain
I stand in awe
As you triumph; you are the victor
A pain comes in waves so intense and extreme
You push through and are all SMILES in between

I ask why, why, why, Cancer!
You accept it and live life's Joy, Joy, Joy!
I grieve for the what could have been
You enjoy the here and now
My heart aches as I watch you endure a very bad day
On which, you shoot grins that feel my heart with utter joy

As I hope and pray for memories I fear may not be made
You make me laugh and smile at the memories made
Just when I think I can bear no more ugliness in this world
You teach me to see the beauty in life
Through this journey together I have never felt such pain
But also, have never experienced such Joy

Before you, I did not truly live
But now I SEE
Life is so short
And very sweet
I will not waste precious time
On angry thoughts, on things I cannot change

I will be in the present, in the here and now
I will enjoy and truly live

Because of Brody, I have finally learned to live.    Sadly, most people go through life having never really experiencing what life has to offer.    Not Brody.  Brody lived his life to the fullest.  He was HAPPY!   He was HAPPY despite so many, many reasons he could tell himself to not be HAPPY.  Brody taught me how to live a happy life.  

 I used to feel like I was sleep-walking through life.  I was on auto-pilot and felt I was constantly running out of time for endless to do lists.  I felt trapped and overworked and was constantly working towards some supposed better future one day.  I would tell myself to just keep dredging on through and one day things will settle down and life will be good.  I lived a rushed and overambitious life and was certainly not taking the time to “smell the roses” so to speak. 

Everybody who knew Brody, knows he had a smile and a laugh like no other.    You could feel the happiness radiate from him.  Brody wasn’t always smiling and laughing though.  He had times he just simply did not feel well and like everybody he had days he woke up not in the best of moods.   But, I could always tell that he was still overall just a happy person even when life was tough.   Knowing Brody means you can’t help but to be inspired to live a happy life. 

Watching Brody I wondered how he could be so happy in the face of so many things one would normally consider obstacles to happiness.  I started trying to see life through Brody’s eyes and constantly imagining what he was thinking or feeling.  I learned many important life lessons from Brody for those seeking a happy life.  I am going to call these Brody Life Lessons. 

Brody Life Lesson Number one is …. Ignore the things you cannot change…. Brody knew he had cancer and that he could not change this.  He knew it could kill him and he couldn’t change this fact.  He chose not to dwell on it and not to complain about it.  He simply saw no point in constantly worrying or complaining about something he could not change.  (I, on the other hand, had great difficulty with this and I have since learned that Brody is right and it serves no good purpose to dwell on something you cannot change). 

Brody Life Lesson Number two…You cannot change the past…… Brody didn’t waste time worrying or complaining about the past either.  He had many painful moments.  He got through them and didn’t waste time reflecting on how awful it was.  He lived in the moment and strived to enjoy each moment. 

Brody Life Lesson Number three…Remember the good times and learn from the bad times….Brody loved to look at old photos, reminisce and hear or retell stories of past fun times.  It feels good to remember the good times.  Brody had a gift too for seeing the good when remembering the bad times.  He learned from past mistakes and naturally laughed at himself for some of his own silly mistakes.  I will never forget him looking back at a video we took of the boys playing in front of Cumberland Falls.  Brody thought we were taking a photo in front of Cumberland Falls and was trying his best to give us a great smile for the photo.    To three year old Brody that meant he needed to say, “cheeeeeese, cheeeeese, cheeeeeese. “  He was screaming “cheeeese” over and over in the video as Bill keeps trying to tell Brody it’s a video not a picture but Brody is screaming “cheeeese” too loudly to hear Bill telling him it’s a video.  So, of course, he just keeps screaming “cheeeese.”  At eight years old, Brody watched the video and couldn’t stop laughing at himself.  Brody’s laugh is infectious and so we all joined in laughing with him.  We laughed so hard we cried watching that video. 

Brody Life Lesson Number four ….Plan for the future, but live in the present…..This one is a biggie!   Brody was a pro at living in the moment.  This was definitely one thing I very much admired about Brody.  But even though he lived in the moment, he still had dreams.  He dreamed and planned for the future too.  He loved to talk about growing up to own his own restaurant.  He wanted to call it, “Brody’s Good Eats.”  Of course, this restaurant would feature all of Brody’s favorite foods.  Sloppy Dogs (which are Sloppy Joes on hotdog buns), Biscuits and Gravy, Mac N Cheese, Tacos, Pizza, Spaghetti with Meatballs and Garlic Bread, Chocolate Cake, Rice Krispie Treats, Chocolate Chip Cookies and Chocolate Milk would all be standards on his restaurant menu.  And, of course, his restaurant would have lots of fun things to do too.  He wanted a dog farm.  After folks enjoyed the yummy food at Brody’s Good Eats they could mosey on over to his dog farm featuring numerous breeds of dogs all trained to do all sorts of tricks.  He loved to talk about all the crazy tricks his dogs would learn to do.  He liked to compare his dog farm idea to Parrot Mountain that we visited in Pigeon Forge, TN.  He loved that place!   It has lots and lots of birds trained to talk and sing and you could feed the birds by hand.  He was sure though that his dog farm would be even more awesome.  He would talk about how many more tricks dogs could learn to do compared  to birds and also that “dogs are mans’ best friend.”  Brody didn’t plan to stop with his dog farm though.  He said, once his restaurant and dog farm made enough money he would buy giraffes for a giraffe farm too.  Then he could make money selling carrots to feed the giraffes.  He said, the giraffe farm would really be just for him because he loves giraffes but he would let other people feed and pet them too.  Then after his restaurant, dog farm and giraffe farm were all doing well, he would add go karts, laser tag, bowling, and an arcade.  This marvelously fun place would be called, “Brody’s Fun Spot.” 

Brody Life Lesson Number Five…Set goals and see the reward…..Brody got through hard times and strived for what he wanted in life by setting goals.  He would start with smaller goals leading up to larger goals.  And, most importantly too, he made sure he had a vision in his mind of the reward he would get for achieving his goals.  As just one tiny example, if he had a bunch of liquid medicine to swallow that looked to be too much to swallow at once, he would break this task into smaller more manageable goals with built in rewards along the way.   If it was 15ml he needed to swallow, then he would try to swallow at least 5ml of it at a time taking 5 minute fun breaks between each 5mls.   It used to drive Bill and I crazy that it would take so long for Brody to take his medicine.  We wanted him to just take it all and get it over with rather than breaking it up.  We learned to just let Brody do it his way.  He got through all kinds of obstacles and hardships in life by breaking it down into smaller bits to deal with at a time.  And, he made sure to enjoy himself during the rewards he incorporated into his plan of attack.  The reward was always on his mind as he got through whatever it was he didn’t want to do.  Bill and I learned to trust Brody and let him continue to set his own goals and rewards. 

Brody Life Lesson Number Six…Don’t live for others… Brody lived his life doing the things he loved.  He didn’t worry about what others expected him to be doing.  He never worried about living up to someone else’s expectations.  Brody knew we loved him no matter what.  He didn’t feel he needed to do something to earn our love.  He knew we just loved him.  Whenever I told Brody I loved him, he would always say, “I know.”  I remember I used to think it was a strange response.  I wondered why he wouldn’t just respond back with “I love you too.”  But really, his response of “I know” was even better.  It’s wonderful to know that he knew I loved him.  It was evident in his behavior too that he knew without a doubt we loved him.  Brody never had anything to hide and nothing to prove.  He was loved and loved himself too.  He knew he was free to be himself and we got to see the true Brody with nothing to hide.  Being able to just be yourself is crucial to a happy life.  Brody didn’t live his life trying to make others happy.  He lived his life doing what made him happy.   

So….we just talked about the Brody Life Lesson of… Don’t Live for Others…..Well, another Brody Life Lesson is Live for Others.  It sounds contradictory, I know.  But there does need to be a little balance here.  Brody was so successful with the Don’t Live for Others rule partially because he knew he was loved.  Love is obviously crucial for happiness.  Brody knew we loved him and we also knew he loved us back.  We made sure we showed Brody we loved him both by our actions and our words.  Brody did the same for us too.  Brody really wasn’t fond of giving hugs. But he knew his mommy liked nothing more than a hug from one of her kiddos.  Brody hugs were always extra sweet though since he didn’t readily give them out very often.  When you got to be a recipient of a Brody hug, you knew he was telling you in a big way that he really loves you.    He didn’t give hugs out without thinking about it.  They were grand gestures of love and his way of showing you that he truly loved you and you are extra special to him.  This was one way Brody lived for others too.  He realized it was important to be sure to show others you do love and care for them.  He didn’t let others dictate how he would live his life but he made sure he lived his life in a way that showed he did love and care for others too. 

Talking about Brody hugs brings to mind another important Brody Life Lesson…Master the Art of Persuasion…. It goes without saying if you can master this it may increase your happiness in life.  And, believe me, Brody was a master!  He sure did know how to persuade anyone to see things his way.  Brody hugs were a key player in this Brody mastered skill.  He bargained for all kinds of things with his hugs.   He was really good at playing his “cancer card” too.  This one pretty much drove his brothers crazy, I am sure.  But it worked.  Brody had no shame in calling his “cancer card” either.  If Brody wanted the pick of shows on TV or the first turn at a game, all he had to do was say, “cancer card” and give us his adorable, pathetic look.  We all caved every time.  He didn’t pull this trick in a sad and depressive way but more a light-hearted, joking and laughing way.  It was too cute not to give in to him every time. 

Brody Life Lesson Number Nine…Block Out Haters.  Brody was very good at blocking out the haters.  He accepted that some people are just cruel (and hoped some of them would snap out of their cruelness one day).  Brody experienced some bullies on the Whitehouse playground a few times.  Usually, it was teenagers that were much older, bigger, and should be wiser than him.  Chemo treatments, radiation treatments, and multiple surgeries are obviously hard on the body.  Sometimes Brody looked sickly and a little funny.  He had problems with his speech, reaction times, walking, facial twitches, and was often very weak and got tired and short of breath easily.  He had to wear pull-ups most of the time due to all the pressure from the tumor.  He had nephrostomy bags which are basically bags to hold his urine since his tumor blocked the flow of urine through normal means.   All of these things seemed to be ripe ammo for some playground bullies at times.  Brody experienced numerous stares and many, many nasty comments on several occasions.  He had to develop a thick skin, so to speak, pretty quickly.  The first few incidences resulted in Brody crying and being scared to go to the playground if there were any other people there.  As he had more time to think about things, he started to get angry and felt hate for the perpetuators.  This was totally understandable, of course.  As more time went on though, his hate turned to pity. He started to feel sorry for these kids and hoped that one day they would feel secure enough about themselves that they would no longer feel the need to put down others to make themselves feel better.   He got to the point that the comments and stares really didn’t faze him anymore.  He did not care what the haters had to say.  Their opinion no longer mattered.  I will never forget the day Brody scared off a bunch of teenagers from the merry go round at the Whitehouse Park.  They were putting Brody down and trying to make him get off the Merry Go Round.  They were basically acting like he was just too disgusting for them to share the Merry Go Round with him.  Brody stood his ground though and embraced his disgustingness.  He was just healing from a major surgery to his abdomen after a tumor resection.  He had a completely gnarly and disgusting looking scar running from sternum to groin.  It wasn’t pretty to look at, for sure.  He still had the steri strips in place and it looked pretty gross still.  Brody ended up raising his shirt and showing him his scar and edged his body closer and closer to each of the teenagers on the Merry Go Round and basically chased them away with his “scary and disgusting” looking scar.  They all ran off pretending to be too disgusted to stay on the Merry Go Round with Brody.  This was, of course, exactly what Brody wanted.  Brody was laughing uncontrollably at the whole situation that little, tiny Brody scared off the big and scary teenagers all by himself.  Then, he and his brothers gladly enjoyed the Merry Go Round without them. 

Brody Life Lesson Number ten….Don’t sweat the small stuff.  If there is one thing just about everyone who faces cancer learns pretty quickly, it is don’t sweat the small stuff.  Your priorities in life certainly change.  So many petty little things that used to evoke stress just don’t anymore. 

And, finally Brody Life Lesson Number eleven…Remember that you’re going to die one day.   Life is short so we all better get busy living the life we want.

The 14^th Dalai Lama describes Man perfectly.  He said….

“Man.

Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money.

Then he sacrifices his money to recuperate his health.

And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present;

The result being that he does not live in the present or the future;

He lives as if he is never going to die, and then he dies having never really lived.”

If you remember the Brody Life Lessons, you won’t be the Man defined by the 14^th Dalai Lama.  Remember these Brody Life Lessons and don’t live as though you will never die, then die never having lived. 

I have just spent quite a bit of time talking about all the wonderful life lessons I learned from Brody and how he has changed my life and so many others forever.  I am so thankful for the time I did get to have with Brody and that he has had a very happy life.  But still, there’s no denying that we all would much rather get to spend much more time with Brody.  The pain of this loss will never go away.   They say with time things will get easier.  But right now it just hurts and I imagine it always will. 

And now ask for us all to bow our heads, as I read the Serenity Prayer.

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His Will;
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever and ever in the next.

Amen

+++++++++++++

Brody's Obituary

Brody Daniel Pizzifred passed away peacefully on January 4th, 2015, in his home in Whitehouse, Ohio comforted by family after nearly 5 years battling childhood cancer (embryonal rhabdomyosarcoma).  Brody was 8 years old.

Brody Daniel Pizzifred was born in Toledo, Ohio at 1:10pm on March 3^rd, 2006.  He was the third and youngest child of three sons of William Anthony Pizzifred and Patricia Ann Pizzifred.

Everybody who knew Brody, knows he had a smile and laugh like no other.  Many people go through life having never really experiencing what life has to offer.  Brody didn't make this mistake.  He chose to make the most of each day and each moment.  He was happy and lived his life to the fullest.  He didn't dwell on the past or things he could not change but instead lived in the moment.  He set goals, rewards and dreamed of what the future may bring too.  He didn't let circumstances or others prevent him from living his life, his way.  He was surrounded by loving and supportive family, friends and community.   He did more living in 8 years than many people in 80 years. 

Whether at the hospital, home, visiting friends or family, or traveling, Brody kept busy having fun.  He loved to travel and go camping with his family and friends and was fortunate to be able to enjoy several vacations.   He was quite the roller coaster enthusiast and water-ride lover and especially enjoyed a Make-A-Wish trip to Disney World, Universal, and Sea World.  Make-A-Wish guests to these parks are given the special privilege of no waiting in lines.  If he found a ride he loved, he could choose to ride it over and over again without waiting in long lines over and over.  He took full advantage of this privilege and spent the majority of his day at Disney World riding Splash Mountain and Thunder Mountain again and again.  At home, he loved playing with his brothers, friends, and neighbors.  Video games, swinging, slides, riding big-wheels, kick-ball, basketball, building forts, making cookies, playing Uno, building and cooking over a camp fire, water gun and nerf gun battles were all favorite past-times.  Brody was an animal lover and greatly enjoyed his many pets which included 3 dogs (Tori, Chewy, and Leia), a hamster (Chubby), a frog (Froggie), a goldfish (Goldie), a cat (Jerry), and 2 parakeets (Bluebee and Snowflake).   If he could've, he would have had a pet giraffe too.  He loved visiting and feeding the giraffes at the drive through safari zoo in Port Clinton, Ohio.  He dreamed of owning a "dog farm" and a "giraffe farm" one day.  He would charge admission to visitors of his farms.  His dogs would be trained to do numerous fun tricks and the giraffes would let you pet and hand-feed them carrots.  He also dreamed of opening a restaurant which he would call, "Brody's Good Eats."  His restaurant would serve all of Brody's favorite foods, of course, and be located right next to his dog and giraffe farms.  Brody made many friends in Cub Scouts, at school, and the hospital.  He was so excited to earn trophies for speed in the Cub Scouts Pinewood Derby during his Tiger and Wolf years.   He worked very hard on his cars both years.  Brody's life was certainly not short on love, friends, family, fun and dreams.

Brody is survived by his loving parents, William and Patricia Pizzifred of Whitehouse, OH; his brothers, 12 year old Geordan Pizzifred and 9 year old Jaden Pizzifred; maternal grandparents Gary and Karen Dalton of Franklin, OH; maternal great grandmother Joy Barker of Monroe, OH; Uncle Dan Dalton of Monroe, OH; Aunt Julie Munson-Jackson of Chattanooga, TN; cousins Ella, Ava, and Lilah Munson-Jackson; Aunt Nancy Pizzifred-Feagan of Saint Petersburg, FL;  Uncle Joseph Pizzifred of Riverside CA; Aunt Luanne Christensen of Riverside California; Uncle John Pizzifred of Victorville, CA;  Aunt Theresa Stanley of Riverside, CA; cousins Christina Roberto, Elizabeth Roberto, Frank Roberto, Bobby Pizzifred, Steve Pizzifred, James Docket, Joseph Dockett, Nick Dockett,  John Pizzifred, Tony Pizzifred, Kyleigh Pizzifred, Stephanie Stanley, and Jenny Stanley; best friends Lucy Shepherd, Levi Naves, Charlie Voss, Austin Musil, Ashton Musil, and Aiden Musil.

He was predeceased by his paternal grandparents Arthur and Beulah Pizzifred of Riverside, CA and Uncle James Pizzifred

Flowers can be sent from Anthony Wayne Floral in Whitehouse, Ohio by calling 567-246-2289 or in lieu of flowers, donations can be made to CureSearch for Children's Cancer at www.curesearch.org or Make-A-Wish at www.Wish.org

Visitation will begin Wednesday January 7^th, 2014 from 4-8pm at Peinert-Dunn Funeral Home, 6603 Providence Street, Whitehouse, OH 43571.  Funeral Services will be Thursday at 11:00am in the funeral home with Pastor Scot Ocke officiating.  To leave an online memory please visit peinertfuneralhome.com